Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
