last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
What drink are we having for lunch?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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