there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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