Umm I'm too high to move.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
