Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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