he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
