i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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