I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
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