I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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