He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
