is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
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