i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
we're making bets on your personal life
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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