Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
