butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
sarcasm needs its own font
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
