Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
bring money and cleavage
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
