Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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