just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
handjob tips. give me some.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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