my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I have aggressive nipples.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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