found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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