$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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