All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
he high fived his dick after we had sex
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
