Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
