Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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