The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
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