so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
