At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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