just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
