Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize
