You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
