So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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