I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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