Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
