Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
