fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
