gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
