Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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