yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
