I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
