True but thats because hes a fetus.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
