I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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