He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Randomize
