Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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