He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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