It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
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