Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
