Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
