Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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