Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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