I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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