i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
