I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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