rhymes with "ouble enetration"
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Randomize
